Enjoy
Your Visit
with Your
Long Distance Family
Long
distance grandparents are required to adapt to change as frequently as a
chameleon switches colors. If you’re new at the job, relax, you’ll learn. The first
lesson you cover is on how to celebrate birthdays and holidays on off-days, or
even celebrate those occasions without loved ones near. But there is one other
unique situation knowing only to long distance grandparents, and that is
hosting our long distance families for their precious visits home.
Through the
years, I’ve gained some expertise. But several years ago, when my daughter’s
family came home for their first two-week visit, I didn’t have a clue. I found
myself on kitchen detail doing some preparation for the next meal. I envied the
laughter and voices coming from the living room. I wanted to join the rest of
the family and watch the antics of our toddler grandbabies. But remembering the
home cooking I had experienced as a child at my grandma’s, I was determined to
provide them with the same memories.
Since this was their first visit
home after moving away, I hadn’t foreseen that this would require continual
kitchen duty for most of their visit. Even with everyone pitching-in, clearing
the table, and helping prepare foods, there were certain things that I felt I
needed to do.
At that moment, I decided to forego my
bountiful table idea and keep my menus simple. Next time, I promised myself, I would prepare
ahead. But for now, I was going to enjoy
our little ones.
Over their next several trips home,
I’ve developed a plan of action to covers the bases of any long distance family
visit. Now, when they arrive, I’m ready.
I emphasis ready because a little planning makes the
difference between me having a fantastic or a frantic visit with
my love ones.
BASE I: About
four weeks ahead, plan your
menus. Meal preparation can be time consuming. Eating out can be time robbing
and expensive. You don’t want either of these. No one wants to spend all their
time in the kitchen while the rest of the family fellowships. Also, wasting
precious minutes sitting in a restaurant, waiting to be served is not fun
either. Most of us know what it is like trying to keep the little ones
entertained while waiting. Money spent eating out could go a long way towards
some sightseeing excursion, swimming, or the most fun of all—shopping with the
grandkids. Please don’t misunderstand, I’m not saying don’t ever go out to eat,
but don’t make it the norm for the family visit.
After completing your menus,
compile your shopping list from them and shop for needed items. Once your
grocery items are purchased, start preparing foods and freezing. I’m always
amazed how many things can be fixed ahead: casseroles, soups, pies, desserts, meatloaf
and hamburger patties are among the favorites to freeze. Plan to make-use of
your Slow Cooker, too. If the visit
falls in warm weather, by all means plan on grilling out.
This is the age of convenience
foods, be good to yourself. There are
bags of French toast sticks, and many other frozen foods waiting for you in the
freezer units at your local supermarket. Don’t feel like your fudging on your
role as a grandmother by adding some of these to your menus. Remember, the main
idea behind the food planning is to free you up for a relaxing and carefree
visit with your family.
BASE 2: Sleepy-time plans are necessary, too. Knowing who
is going to sleep where and on what makes late night arrivals go smoothly. Our
daughter and son-in-law have seven children, ages 2-16, so we go for the floor
plan. We have one guest room, which goes to the adults. I purchased the foldout
dorm chairs that many college kids use. These make nice floor cots for
sleeping. They are easily stored by stacking on top of each other. During the
visit, they can be folded up during the day. We have also used an air mattress.
Plan to provide sheets, blanket and pillow for each visitor. You will also want
to purchase extra towels and wash clothes to keep for these family visits,
watch for sales.
If traveling by car, our long
distance family brings playpens for the little ones to sleep in. If your family
travels by air, you can borrow playpens from a fellow church member or
neighbor. Between visits, sheets,
blankets, pillows, towels and washcloths can be stored in storage tubs with
tight fitting lids. They are easily
stacked in a basement, attic, or closet. Planning ahead will enable your family to have
a dreamy vacation.
BASE 3: Consider ages of grandchildren and interests of family members, and then
plan some special activities. Don’t over plan and pack each day with continual
activities that wear everyone out. But don’t let life just happen, or you’ll
run the risk of their visit being over before you’ve done the activities that
you had been anticipating. Lazy mornings, and active afternoons and evenings,
work for us. Our large family often finds different ages going places at
different times. The younger children may enjoy the morning with Grandma at the
park and nap in the afternoons as Grandpa baby-sits. The older children, along
with some of the adults, may take advantage of the toddlers’ quiet time and go
to the mall, swimming, or to a movie. Cousins, friends, aunts and uncles may
stop over for an evening with the visiting family. Holidays and birthdays
provide ideal opportunities for extended family get-togethers, but if none fall
during the long distance family’s visit, having the family home is enough
reason to celebrate. Planning flexible
activities is a gift that you can give your family, enabling them to tuck away
some keepsake memories of your visit together.
BASE 4: There is one more necessary base to cover,
and that is dealing with laundry. If
your family is visiting for more than a few days, giving each guest a laundry
basket provides an efficient laundry method. Have them place this improvised
hamper near their sleeping area, or if space provides, set baskets up in the
laundry room for colored clothes, whites and towels. Explain to the grandchildren that they are to
place their dirty clothing in the baskets. This eliminates the lost sock syndrome—well
almost.
You’ve covered your bases, and now
you’re ready to ease into a homey visit with your long distance family. This is your time to sit back, relax and
enjoy your family. Let the child in you escape and do some much deserved
playing with your loved ones. This visit is bound to be the best one yet!
Janet Teitsort is the author of Long Distance Grandma, Howard Publishing. She loves to share about Long Distance
Grandparenting. If you are a long distance grandparent, or
know someone who is, Janet’s book, Long Distance Grandma: Staying Connected
Across The Miles provides month-by-month tips and activities covering every
aspect of long distance grandparenting. The
book provides insight on being a grandparent to those in the military, college
students, and blended families. To find
out more information about Janet Teitsort go to www.janetteitsort.blog
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