Enjoy Your Visit

with Your

Long Distance Family


              Long distance grandparents are required to adapt to change as frequently as a chameleon switches colors. If you’re new at the job, relax, you’ll learn. The first lesson you cover is on how to celebrate birthdays and holidays on off-days, or even celebrate those occasions without loved ones near. But there is one other unique situation knowing only to long distance grandparents, and that is hosting our long distance families for their precious visits home.

            Through the years, I’ve gained some expertise. But several years ago, when my daughter’s family came home for their first two-week visit, I didn’t have a clue. I found myself on kitchen detail doing some preparation for the next meal. I envied the laughter and voices coming from the living room. I wanted to join the rest of the family and watch the antics of our toddler grandbabies. But remembering the home cooking I had experienced as a child at my grandma’s, I was determined to provide them with the same memories.

Since this was their first visit home after moving away, I hadn’t foreseen that this would require continual kitchen duty for most of their visit. Even with everyone pitching-in, clearing the table, and helping prepare foods, there were certain things that I felt I needed to do.

 At that moment, I decided to forego my bountiful table idea and keep my menus simple.  Next time, I promised myself, I would prepare ahead.  But for now, I was going to enjoy our little ones.

Over their next several trips home, I’ve developed a plan of action to covers the bases of any long distance family visit.  Now, when they arrive, I’m ready.  I emphasis ready because a little planning makes the difference between me having a fantastic or a frantic visit with my love ones.

  BASE I:  About four weeks ahead, plan your menus. Meal preparation can be time consuming. Eating out can be time robbing and expensive. You don’t want either of these. No one wants to spend all their time in the kitchen while the rest of the family fellowships. Also, wasting precious minutes sitting in a restaurant, waiting to be served is not fun either. Most of us know what it is like trying to keep the little ones entertained while waiting. Money spent eating out could go a long way towards some sightseeing excursion, swimming, or the most fun of all—shopping with the grandkids. Please don’t misunderstand, I’m not saying don’t ever go out to eat, but don’t make it the norm for the family visit.

After completing your menus, compile your shopping list from them and shop for needed items. Once your grocery items are purchased, start preparing foods and freezing. I’m always amazed how many things can be fixed ahead:  casseroles, soups, pies, desserts, meatloaf and hamburger patties are among the favorites to freeze. Plan to make-use of your Slow Cooker, too.  If the visit falls in warm weather, by all means plan on grilling out.  

This is the age of convenience foods, be good to yourself.  There are bags of French toast sticks, and many other frozen foods waiting for you in the freezer units at your local supermarket. Don’t feel like your fudging on your role as a grandmother by adding some of these to your menus. Remember, the main idea behind the food planning is to free you up for a relaxing and carefree visit with your family.

BASE 2:  Sleepy-time plans are necessary, too. Knowing who is going to sleep where and on what makes late night arrivals go smoothly. Our daughter and son-in-law have seven children, ages 2-16, so we go for the floor plan. We have one guest room, which goes to the adults. I purchased the foldout dorm chairs that many college kids use. These make nice floor cots for sleeping. They are easily stored by stacking on top of each other. During the visit, they can be folded up during the day. We have also used an air mattress. Plan to provide sheets, blanket and pillow for each visitor. You will also want to purchase extra towels and wash clothes to keep for these family visits, watch for sales.  

If traveling by car, our long distance family brings playpens for the little ones to sleep in. If your family travels by air, you can borrow playpens from a fellow church member or neighbor.  Between visits, sheets, blankets, pillows, towels and washcloths can be stored in storage tubs with tight fitting lids.  They are easily stacked in a basement, attic, or closet.  Planning ahead will enable your family to have a dreamy vacation.

            BASE 3:  Consider ages of grandchildren and interests of family members, and then plan some special activities. Don’t over plan and pack each day with continual activities that wear everyone out. But don’t let life just happen, or you’ll run the risk of their visit being over before you’ve done the activities that you had been anticipating. Lazy mornings, and active afternoons and evenings, work for us. Our large family often finds different ages going places at different times. The younger children may enjoy the morning with Grandma at the park and nap in the afternoons as Grandpa baby-sits. The older children, along with some of the adults, may take advantage of the toddlers’ quiet time and go to the mall, swimming, or to a movie. Cousins, friends, aunts and uncles may stop over for an evening with the visiting family. Holidays and birthdays provide ideal opportunities for extended family get-togethers, but if none fall during the long distance family’s visit, having the family home is enough reason to celebrate.  Planning flexible activities is a gift that you can give your family, enabling them to tuck away some keepsake memories of your visit together.

            BASE 4:  There is one more necessary base to cover, and that is dealing with laundry.  If your family is visiting for more than a few days, giving each guest a laundry basket provides an efficient laundry method. Have them place this improvised hamper near their sleeping area, or if space provides, set baskets up in the laundry room for colored clothes, whites and towels.  Explain to the grandchildren that they are to place their dirty clothing in the baskets.  This eliminates the lost sock syndrome—well almost.  

You’ve covered your bases, and now you’re ready to ease into a homey visit with your long distance family.  This is your time to sit back, relax and enjoy your family. Let the child in you escape and do some much deserved playing with your loved ones. This visit is bound to be the best one yet!  

Janet Teitsort is the author of Long Distance Grandma, Howard Publishing. She loves to share about Long Distance Grandparenting. If you are a long distance grandparent, or know someone who is, Janet’s book, Long Distance Grandma: Staying Connected Across The Miles provides month-by-month tips and activities covering every aspect of long distance grandparenting.  The book provides insight on being a grandparent to those in the military, college students, and blended families.  To find out more information about Janet Teitsort go to www.janetteitsort.blog







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